Film on Television

VH1’s Movies that Rock Series: Purple Rain (1:03-1:33 a.m.)

1:03-1:22:
1) Morris Day soliciting Apollonia to listen to his tape (all the central characters in Purple Rain, with the possible exception of Prince, retain their real names; elision of fiction and actual celebrity—a semi-autobiographical film about the rise of a real life star on a network that promotes that star). The VH1 logo appears constantly in the bottom right hand corner, and sometimes advertises later VH1 programming.
2) “Don’t you want to be a star?” he asks (the question exploited by the reality television later advertised).
3) Words and sex scenes are censored (a difference between the intended audiences of film and television).
4) Scenes of domestic abuse; Prince as The Kid struggles to resist his father’s violent impulses within himself (a film critical of the family, on a network which appeals to young people, curiously edited to gesture towards appeasing a family audience—what?).
5) The Kid gives Apollonia his earring after she gives him a guitar (subversion of gender roles! Conservative America is frightened).
6) “When Doves Cry” plays. The film has what are in effect music videos and concert footage within it; prime VH1 programming.
7) The Kid’s father advises him to “Never get married,” followed immediately, as if by way of emphasis, by a…
8) Commercial break!
a) VH1’s Sunday line-up is advertised.
b) A reality show featuring scantily clad women wrestling and otherwise behaving badly is advertised.
c) Simon and Garfunkel parody fast-food advertisement.
d) Video game advertisement.
e) Car commercial parody that is actually a razor commercial.
f) A competing fast-food advertisement emphasizing large portion sizes.
g) Finally, a family ad: K-Mart Halloween!
h) Straight car commercial.
i) Birth Control commercial parodying 50’s style synchronized swimming.
j) Holiday family movie featuring Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon which also ought to appeal to the Purple Rain demographic.
k) Scrabble.
l) Home business commercial.
m) Another reality television show with scantily clad fighting (non-wrestling) women.
The commercials are aimed at a variety of demographics; few are family oriented. Almost all, however, fail to compete with the coolness/awesomeness of Prince and undermine VH1’s claims to cool, especially the home business advertisement.
1:29-1:33:
9) After seven minutes of commercials, Purple Rain returns. “Movies That Rock” is advertised in the corner. Celebrity rehab is also advertised.
10) The Kid and his band The Revolution perform “Darling Nikki” at a club. There is a lot of thrusting. The idea that removing nudity and several words makes the film more appropriate becomes increasingly non-sensical. Also, the advertisements increasingly seem to bear no relation to the kind of person who watches Purple Rain.
11) Preliminary conclusion: television doesn’t make sense. Or, more clearly, the flow is not at all coherent, even in a half-hour window.